The Most Underrated Way to Reinvent Yourself (3-Step Process)

You have the potential to become whoever you want to be, here's how:

You’ve tried changing before but it never sticks.

Willpower and discipline aren’t enough - something deeper is driving our behavior. Something that if left unchecked, keeps you trapped in the same repeating patterns.

I’ll show you what it is but first, let me tell how I was stuck in addiction for years without realizing why.

I wanted to change but I constantly fell back into old patterns.

Here’s how I set myself up for failure.

During the week, I spent less time on my phone, worked on my goals, and focused more on growth than cheap dopamine.

But on the weekends, I gave in.

I told myself I needed to “enjoy life” and some time off.

I played video games, smoked weed and numbed myself with distractions. I thought I needed those things to wind down.

I’m not saying that taking a break is wrong, we need rest to stay balanced and perform at our best. But feeding our addictions is not resting.

It’s solidifying the version of us that we don’t want to be.

Your brain will constantly try to convince you that your old, unfavorable habit is not bad and that if you just reduce it a little, it will be fine.

It won’t.

I only changed once I completely cut out those things.

I stopped smoking weed, stopped playing video games, I limited the time I spent on my phone – even on days off.

I realized that I used weekends as a cope to feed my addictions.

Here’s the thing,

I didn’t see those habits as something I wanted to change. The true change I wanted to see was making more money, having more freedom, and being more confident.

But I realized that this behavior had a deeper impact on me.

It wasn’t about the weed or the constant scrolling. Yes, they had negative effects on me, but the real issue was that it reaffirmed the person I didn’t want to be anymore.

I realized that change is about something entirely different than willpower.

I realized that the person I wanted to become wouldn’t do those things. They wouldn’t play video games, smoke weed or spend hours a day scrolling through social media.

I knew that if I wanted to become that person – I had to stop these things.

It was painful.

I was addicted.

I was bored and I wanted to escape into pleasure.

But I knew that my goals were on the other side of the cheap stimulation.

So I didn’t give in.

Eventually, I was able to sustain the change without falling back to my old self.

What made this time different? Why didn’t I fall back?

I realized that change is not simply something you strive for - it’s something you become.

It’s not about forcing new behaviors; it’s about reshaping the identity that drives them.

The things we struggle to change (behavior, financial status, mindset, etc) are determined by how we see ourselves.

That’s why patterns repeat, addicts relapse, and you still do what you told yourself not to years ago.

Because your identity hasn’t changed.

Now that you understand what’s been holding you back, let’s break down exactly how to change it.

REPROGRAMMING YOUR IDENTITY

This builds on the success engine concept I shared last week. If you're interested, check it out. Here, I’m applying a similar idea to reframe our identity.

It’s based on the mental images we create.

Think of a thermostat – it constantly adjusts to match the temperature you set. If the door opens and the temperature drops, the thermostat kicks in to restore balance.

Our identity works the same, it adjusts thoughts, behaviors, and decisions to our ‘setting’. If your identity aligns with success, your actions will follow naturally.

When you see yourself as the person who follows through, taking action becomes second nature – it doesn’t require discipline.

A doctor doesn’t need discipline to care for their patients and a firefighter doesn’t need it to run towards danger.

It’s what they committed themselves to do. It’s who they are.

They don’t think twice about whether they feel like doing it or not, they do what’s necessary to fulfill their duty.

When you start becoming the person you want to be, you naturally do the things that need to get done to sustain that character.

If you want to be a successful, fulfilled entrepreneur, you must see yourself as one. However, it’s impossible to do so if you constantly repeat behaviors that such a person wouldn’t.

Not everybody wants to be an entrepreneur, this is just an example. But whatever you want to achieve in life – your self-image must be aligned with it.

---

Here’s the 3-step process to unlocking your new identity:

1 – CLARIFY YOUR DREAM CHARACTER

Get creative. Let your inspiration flow. Write this down as if you’re this person right now. Make it as detailed as possible.

- What does your average day look like?
- What do you stand for? What are your values?
- How do you speak and communicate?
- How do you handle challenges?
- How do you present yourself?
- Who are the people you surround yourself with?
- What does your environment look like?

These are rough ideas, expand on them and really flesh out that character. The more vivid and detailed the better.

This isn’t about merely creating a source of inspiration.

It’s about actually becoming that person. The habits, thoughts, work, leisure, appearance, personality, etc – all those things need to be aligned with the person you want to become.

Your goal isn’t to ‘act’ like them when you feel like it but to literally become them.

If you stop being that person on the weekend because ‘you need a break’ (like I did) you missed the point.

This is about creating a reality you don’t want to escape from.

2 – REMOVE AND REPLACE CONFLICTING HABITS

What feels like rest is often just stimulation. True rest restores you; cheap dopamine drains you.

Take a walk, exercise, read a book, or have a conversation with someone you love.

Trust me, the things you tell yourself you need in order to chill and enjoy life are not as important as your mind wants to convince you.

Reduce and replace them with things that give you energy, rather than take it away.

This isn’t just about resetting your dopamine levels (although that in itself is extremely powerful), it’s about letting go of the behaviors your future self wouldn’t engage in.

3 – VISUALIZE YOURSELF AS THAT PERSON

Meditate and visualize yourself living that life, being that person, as vividly as possible.

Go through an average day being your future self and engage all five senses. Make it as alive and colorful as you can. The more detail the more effect this has.

It takes practice so stick with it.

Action Steps:

• Define your dream character: Use the questions above to create a detailed vision of your ideal self. Identify what aspects of your life need to change to align with this version of you.

• Eliminate cheap dopamine: For the next 7 days, remove the low-value habits you convince yourself are important. Instead, replace them with activities that either drive your mission forward or provide real rest.

• Visualize yourself as that person: Make visualization a daily habit, starting with 15 minutes. As you get more comfortable, extend the time if you like. It takes practice, so don’t get discouraged if it feels difficult at first. Just keep going.

Change is not about willpower and force – it’s about altering the image you have of yourself and building a life around the person you want to become.

Our mind wants to convince us that feeling good right now is the main priority but when we instead focus on the life we want to build and the person we want to be – feeling good comes as a by-product of living that.

It’s deeper than empty pleasure. It’s real fulfillment. It’s being who you truly are.

---